Kids Have Sex

If you, as a parent, have wondered when it is time to have "the talk" with your child, don't be tempted to delay.

If you, as a young person, have wondered about sex, check this out: "Baby-faced boy is father at 13."

Four-feet tall Alfie, a youngster whose voice is yet to break, had one night of unprotected sex when he was 12. Though it was his first time, nine months later his daughter was born.

As a parent, I get that out of this story that the sex talk needs to come much sooner, no matter how young the child may still seem.

Note the dad's comment: "I will talk to him again and it will be the birds and the bees talk." In other words, they hadn't gotten around to talking about the biggest temptation facing boys and girls. That's something for us to think about.

I hope that young people get something else out of this story.

For instance, in those days not-so-long-ago when I was a teen, I would like to have said that a desire to honor God kept me from having premarital sex. To be honest, though that desire was there, the truth was that I had this nagging fear that my partner would become pregnant on our first go.

Well, surprise, surprise: Heather and I married in November 2000, and our first child was born in August 2001. Do the math; that's not much alone time as newlyweds. At least Heather and I were both 20 and on our own while having our first baby, not 13 and 15 and still (obviously) living at home. But, I think the moral to the story is the same. The biology of fertilization works even if you're a newbie.

There are good Gospel reasons to wait to have sex until your wedding night. Someone once said that the honeymoon is when you get to unwrap your gift from God, and there is some great truth to that. You find your satisfaction in Christ until your wedding night, and then you receive your reward. You can look your spouse in the eyes and honestly say, "You are the only one for me,"and then proceed to live the rest of your lives as man and wife sharing the most intimate of moments.

Incidentally, that is an awesome glimpse of our day in glory when we look Christ in the eye and say, "You are the Lord, my God,"and spend the rest of eternity worshiping Him.

However, I hope that young people will get to spend their teen years soaking up the mysteries of the Gospel rather than soaking up the mystery moisture the baby left in the living room carpet.

Someone else likened sex to setting a fire in your living room: in your fireplace the flames provide heat, comfort, and life to your home. On your coffee-table, the flames burn down your house. The thought was that you should keep sex where it belongs to get the most out of it.

Just don't risk it.

When you, as a young man or woman, find yourself thinking about sex, just remember (1) how temporary the pleasure is and (2) how it seems to be designed for marriage in that babies (families) are the natural byproduct. Instead of being seeking a few minutes of pleasure that could end with... undesirable results, learn of the all-surpassing worth of Christ. That way, you are not only trying to stop the encroaching lust in your heart, but you are replacing it by learning to be satisfied in the glory of God.

But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires (Romans 13:14).

As one final note before I close, I say bravo to these guys decision to have the baby rather than abort. That is very responsible. However, it is not necessary to keep the baby if you are too young to take care of it. Couples across the country who cannot have children are on waiting lists to adopt newborns, so there are other options for you through Crisis Pregnancy Centers and the like.

Hope this helps!

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